What high-value men understand about closed doors

Rejection is a painful feeling. It can be gut-wrenching. It can destroy your self-perception, your charisma, your esteem, your confidence.

But it doesn’t have to.

We simply cannot look at rejection at face value. To accept it, grow from it, and appreciate it, we have to look deeper, change our perspective, and see it for what it truly is.

Rejection is a blessing. Oh, what a beautiful blessing rejection is.

We’ve all experienced it. We’ve all felt it. But few of us have mastered it.

That girl you confessed your love and interest to, she shut you down. A college or university that rejected your application. A job you were hoping to get rejected your resume, your interview. A boss who fired you after you showed loyalty and hard work. A wife who decided divorce was necessary.

I could go on and on about all the ways one can feel rejected.

Of course, the pain varies by the closeness of the person doing the rejecting. It’s easier to process rejection from someone we just met than rejection from a parent or a spouse.

So how can we master rejection? How can we find beauty in it?

It’s much simpler than one might think. It’s just changing our “perspective” seeing rejection from a new angle. The question is this: What is the healthy perspective from which I should see rejection?

When you see it as a blessing, the question becomes: How can this be a blessing?

God’s Timing.

One of my favorite things I’ve heard from a person: God’s currency to human beings cannot be money, because that would make Him an unfair God. Some have lots, some have a few. Some evil men have plenty of money, while humble, kind, charitable people sometimes don’t have much.

So what is God’s currency? Time. Whether you are a good or bad person, we all have the same amount of hours: 24 hours in a day. What we choose to do with this time is on us, but we’ve all been dealt the same hand.

Now that we have this perspective: the girl rejecting you at the bar blessed you by not wasting your time, freeing you to move on to someone who will appreciate you and value you for who you are. That company that rejected you, the boss that fired you. Do you want to continue working, spending your life, building wealth for someone who treated you this way? Life is passing by. You will never get those years back.

When my ex-wife divorced me, it broke me. It was the most painful experience of my life. But would I want to continue in a marriage where she is no longer involved, no longer invested? No. She gave me years to focus on building a good future for our children, and later, to find a partner who accepts me, loves me, and respects me.

Rejection is just a closed door to move forward.

The opposite would be the bar girl showing mild interest, making you waste time and resources, and at the end she never chose you, always unsure about you. The opposite is giving your life to a company that would replace you by Monday if you died, or worse, going to work for someone who hates your guts all the days of your life. Staying in a marriage where she would be unhappy the rest of her life, and even glad when you die.

Rejection is just redirection of energy and priorities. It’s a gift someone can give you. It’s beautiful.

Jesus talked to His disciples about rejection. In Matthew 10:14, He said: “If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, leave that home or town and shake the dust off your feet.”

So shake the dust off your feet and move forward.

Being a high-value, healthy man in body, spirit, mind, and soul is understanding that other people don’t have the power to define you. That choice belongs to you.